“Perhaps by an inward conviction，” he replied， lookingsideways at me， to discover whether I smiled； “perhaps byan outward sign.”
“Then believe me，” said I， “the outward sign is alreadygranted you， and the inward conviction ought to follow.
We are told of pious men in old times， who committedthem selves to the care of Providence， and saw themanifestation of its will in the slightest circumstances； asin the shooting of a star， the flight of a bird， or the coursetaken by some brute animal. Sometimes even a stupid asswas their guide. May not I be as good a one？”
“I do not know，” said the pilgrim， with perfect simplicity.
We did， however， follow the same road， and were notovertaken， as I partly apprehended， by the keepers of anylunatic asylum in pursuit of a stray patient. Perhaps thestranger felt as much doubt of my sanity as I did of his，though certainly with less justice； since I was fully awareof my own extravagances， while he acted as wildly， anddeemed it heavenly wisdom. We were a singular couple，strikingly contrasted， yet curiously assimilated， each ofus remarkable enough by himself， and doubly so in theother’s company. Without any formal compact， we kepttogether， day after day， till our union appeared permanent.
Even had I seen nothing to love and admire in him， Icould never have thought of deserting one who needed mecontinually； for I never knew a person， not even a woman，so unfit to roam the world in solitude， as he was—sopainfully shy， so easily discouraged by slight obstacles， andso often depressed by a weight within himself.
I was now far from my native place， but had not yetstepped before the public. A slight tremor seized me，whenever I thought of relinquishing the immunities of aprivate character， and giving every man， and for money，too， the right， which no man yet possessed， of treatingme with open scorn. But about a week after contractingthe above alliance， I made my bow to an audience of ninepersons， seven of whom hissed me in a very disagreeablemanner， and not without good cause. Indeed， the failurewas so signal， that it would have been mere swindling toretain the money which had been paid， on my impliedcontract to give its value of amusement； so I called in thedoor-keeper， bade him refund the whole receipts， a mightysum， and was gratified with a round of applause， by wayof offset to the hisses. This event would have looked mosthorrible in anticipation； a thing to make a man shoothimself， or run a muck， or hide himself in caverns， wherehe might not see his own burning blush； but the realitywas not so very hard to bear. It is a fact， that I was moredeeply grieved by an almost parallel misfortune， whichhappened to my companion on the same evening. Inmy own behalf， I was angry and excited， not depressed；my blood ran quick， my spirits rose buoyantly； and Ihad never felt such a confidence of future success， anddetermination to achieve it， as at that trying moment. Iresolved to persevere， if it were only to wring the reluctantpraise from my enemies.
Hitherto， I had immensely underrated the difficulties ofmy idle trade； now I recognized， that it demanded nothingshort of my whole powers， cultivated to the utmost， andexerted with the same prodigality as if I were speaking fora great party， or for the nation at large， on the floor of thecapitol. No talent or attainment could come amiss； everything， indeed， was requisite； wide observation， variedknowledge， deep thoughts， and sparkling ones； pathos andlevity， and a mixture of both， like sunshine in a rain-drop；lofty imagination， veiling itself in the garb of common life；and the practiced art which alone could render these gifts，and more than these， available. Not that I ever hopedto be thus qualified. But my despair was no ignoble one；for， knowing the impossibility of satisfying myself， evenshould the world be satisfied， I did my best to overcomeit， investigated the causes of every defect， and strove， withpatient stubbornness， to remove them in the next attempt.
It is one of my few sources of pride， that， ridiculous as theobject was， I followed it up with the firmness and energyof a man.
I manufactured a great variety of plots and skeletonsof tales， and kept them ready for use， leaving the fillingup to the inspiration of the moment； though I cannotremember ever to have told a tale， which did not varyconsiderably from my pre-conceived idea， and acquire anovelty of aspect as often as I repeated it. Oddly enough，my success was generally in proportion to the differencebetween the conception and accomplishment. I providedtwo or more commencements and catastrophes to manyof the tales， a happy expedient， suggested by the doublesets of sleeves and trimmings， which diversified the suitsin Sir Piercy Shafton’s wardrobe. But my best efforts hada unity， a wholeness， and a separate character， that did notadmit of this sort of mechanism.
THE VILLAGE THEATRE
About the first of September， my fellow-traveller andmyself arrived at a country town， where a small companyof actors， on their return from a summer’s campaign inthe British Provinces， were giving a series of dramaticexhibitions. A moderately sized hall of the tavern hadbeen converted into a theatre. The performances thatevening were The Heir at Law， and No Song No Supper，with the recitation of Alexander’s Feast between the playand farce. The house was thin and dull. But the next day，there appeared to be brighter prospects， the play-billsannouncing， at every corner， on the town-pump， and，awful sacrilege！ on the very door of the meeting-house，an Unprecedented Attraction！！ After setting forth theordinary entertainments of a theatre， the public wereinformed， in the hugest type that the printing-offficecould supply， that the manager had been fortunate enoughto accomplish an engagement with the celebrated StoryTeller. He would make his first appearance that evening， andrecite his famous tale of “Mr. Higginbotham’s Catastrophe！”
