"What he says is true,and I will go further and say that it is my belief that you would have found the show business impossible if Ihad taken that sort of creature aboard.You'd have got mightily discouraged after your Antediluvians had chewed up a few dozen steam calliopes,and eaten every other able-bodied exhibit you had managed to secure.I'd have tried to save a couple of Discosaurians if Ihadn't supposed they were able to take care of themselves.Acombination of sea-serpent and dragon,with a neck twenty-two feet long,it seemed to me,ought to have been able to ride out any storm or fall of rain;but there I was wrong,and I am free to admit my error.It never occurred to me that the sea-serpents were in any danger,so I let them alone,with the result that I never saw but one other,and he was only an illusion due to that unhappy use of stimulants to which,with shocking bad taste,you have chosen to refer.""I didn't mean to call up unpleasant memories,"said Barnum."Inever believed you got half-seas over,anyhow;but,to return to our muttons,why didn't you hand down a few varieties of the Therium family to posterity?There were the Dinotherium and the Megatherium,either one of which would have knocked spots out of any leopard that ever was made,and along side of which even my woolly horse would have paled into insignificance.That's what I can't understand in your selections;with Megatheriums to burn,why save leopards and panthers and other such every-day creatures?""What kind of a boat do you suppose I had?"cried Noah."Do you imagine for a moment that she was four miles on the water-line,with a mile and three-quarters beam?If I'd had a pair of Dinotheriums in the stern of that Ark,she'd have tipped up fore and aft,until she'd have looked like a telegraph-pole in the water,and if I'd put 'em amidships they'd have had to be wedged in so tightly they couldn't move to keep the vessel trim.I didn't go to sea,my friend,for the purpose of being tipped over in mid-ocean every time one of my cargo wanted to shift his weight from one leg to the other.""It was bad enough with the elephants,wasn't it,papa?"said Shem.
"Yes,indeed,my son,"returned the patriarch."It was bad enough with the elephants.We had to shift our ballast half a dozen times a day to keep the boat from travelling on her beam ends,the elephants moved about so much;and when we came to the question of provender,it took up about nine-tenths of our hold to store hay and peanuts enough to keep them alive and good-tempered.On the whole,I think it's rather late in the day,considering the trouble I took to save anything but myself and my family,to be criticised as I now am.You ought to be much obliged to me for saving any animals at all.Most people in my position would have built a yacht for themselves and family,and let everything else slide.""That is quite true,"observed Raleigh,with a pacificatory nod at Noah."You were eminently unselfish,and while,with Mr.Barnum,Iexceedingly regret that the Saurians and Therii and other tribes were left on the pier when you sailed,I nevertheless think that you showed most excellent judgment at the time.""He was the only man who had any at all,for that matter,"suggested Shem,"and it required all his courage to show it.Everybody was guying him.Sinners stood around the yard all day and every day,criticising the model;one scoffer pretended he thought her a canal-boat,and asked how deep the flood was likely to be on the tow-path,and whether we intended to use mules in shallow water and giraffes in deep;another asked what time allowance we expected to get in a fifteen-mile run,and hinted that a year and two months per mile struck him as being the proper thing--""It was far from pleasant,"said Noah,tapping his fingers together reflectively."I don't want to go through it again,and if,as Raleigh suggests,history is likely to repeat herself,I'll sublet the contract to Barnum here,and let him get the chaff.""It was all right in the end,though,dad,"said Shem."We had the great laugh on 'hoi polloi'the second day out.""We did,indeed,"said Noah."When we told 'em we only carried first-class passengers and had no room for emigrants,they began to see that the Ark wasn't such an old tub,after all;and a good ninety per cent.of them would have given ten dollars for a little of that time allowance they'd been talking to us about for several centuries."Noah lapsed into a musing silence,and Barnum rose to leave.
"I still wish you'd saved a Discosaurus,"he said."A creature with a neck twenty-two feet long would have been a gold mine to me.He could have been trained to stand in the ring,and by stretching out his neck bite the little boys who sneak in under the tent and occupy seats on the top row.""Well,for your sake,"said Noah,with a smile,"I'm very sorry;but for my own,I'm quite satisfied with the general results."And they all agreed that the patriarch had every reason to be pleased with himself.
