登陆注册
46393600000078

第78章 Fictions(25)

Soapy had confidence in himself from the lowest button of his vest upward. He was shaven, and his coat was decent and his neat black, ready-tied four-in-hand had been presented to him by a lady missionary on Thanksgiving Day. If he could reach a table in the restaurant unsuspected success would be his. The portion of him that would show above the table would raise no doubt in the waiter’s mind. A roasted mallard duck, thought Soapy, would be about the thing—with a bottle ofChablis, and then Camembert, a demi—tasse and a cigar. One dollar for the cigar would be enough. The total would not be so high as to call forth any supreme manifestation of revenge from the café management; and yet the meat would leave him filled and happy for the journey to his winter refuge.

But as Soapy set foot inside the restaurant door the head waiter’s eye fell upon his frayed trousers and decadent shoes. Strong and ready hands turned him about and conveyed him in silence and haste to the sidewalk and averted the ignoble fate of the menaced mallard.

Soapy turned off Broadway. It seemed that his route to the coveted Island was not to be an epicurean one. Some other way of entering limbo must be thought of.

At a corner of Sixth Avenue electric lights and cunningly displayed wares behind plate-glass made a shop window conspicuous. Soapy took a cobblestone and dashed it through the glass. People came running around the corner, a policeman in the lead. Soapy stood still, with his hands in his pockets, and smiled at the sight of brass buttons.

“Where’s the man that done that?” inquired the officer, excitedly. “Don’t you figure out that I might have had something to do with it?”

said Soapy, not without sarcasm, but friendly, as one greets good fortune.

The policeman’s mind refused to accept Soapy even as a clue. Men who smash windows do not remain to parley with the law’s minions. They take to their heels. The policeman saw a man halfway down the block running to catch a car. With drawn club he joined in the pursuit. Soapy, with disgust in his heart, loafed along, twice unsuccessful.

On the opposite side of the street was a restaurant of no great pretensions. It catered to large appetites and modest purses. Its crockery and atmosphere were thick; its soup and napery thin. Into this place Soapy took his accusive shoes and telltale trousers without challenge. At a table he sat and consumed beefsteak, flapjacks, doughnuts and pie. And then to the waiter he betrayed the fact that the minutest coin and himself were strangers.

“Now, get busy and call a cop,” said Soapy. “And don’t keep a gentleman waiting.”

“No cop for youse,” said the waiter, with a voice like butter cakes and an eye like the cherry in a Manhattan cocktail. “Hey, Con!”

Neatly upon his left ear on the callous pavement two waiters pitched Soapy. He arose, joint by joint, as a carpenter’s rule opens, and beat the dust from his clothes. Arrest seemed but a rosy dream. The Island seemed very far away. A policeman who stood before a drug store two doors away laughed and walked down the street.

Five blocks Soapy travelled before his courage permitted him to woo capture again. This time the opportunity presented what he fatuously termed to himself a “cinch.” A young woman of a modest and pleasing guise was standing before a show window gazing with sprightly interest at its display of shaving mugs and inkstands, and two yards from the window a large policeman of severe demeanour leaned against a water plug.

It was Soapy’s design to assume the r?le of the despicable and execrated “masher.” The refined and elegant appearance of his victim and the contiguity of the conscientious cop encouraged him to believe that he would soon feel the pleasant official clutch upon his arm that would insure his winter quarters on the right little, tight little isle.

Soapy straightened the lady missionary’s ready-made tie, dragged his shrinking cuffs into the open, set his hat at a killing cant and sidled toward the young woman. He made eyes at her, was taken with sudden coughs and “hems,” smiled, smirked and went brazenly through the impudent and contemptible litany of the “masher.” With half an eye Soapy saw that the policeman was watching him fixedly. The young woman moved away a few steps, and again bestowed her absorbed attention upon the shaving mugs. Soapy followed, boldly stepping to her side, raised his hat and said:

“Ah there, Bedelia! Don’t you want to come and play in my yard?”

The policeman was still looking. The persecuted young woman had but to beckon a finger and Soapy would be practically en route for his insular haven. Already he imagined he could feel the cozy warmth of the station-house. The young woman faced him and, stretching out a hand, caught Soapy’s coat sleeve.

“Sure, Mike,” she said, joyfully,“if you’ll blow me to a pail of suds. I’d have spoke to you sooner, but the cop was watching.”

With the young woman playing the clinging ivy to his oak Soapy walked past the policeman overcome with gloom. He seemed doomed to liberty.

At the next corner he shook off his companion and ran. He halted in the district where by night are found the lightest streets, hearts, vows and librettos. Women in furs and men in greatcoats moved gaily in the wintry air. A sudden fear seized Soapy that some dreadful enchantment had rendered him immune to arrest. The thought brought a little of panic upon it, and when he came upon another policeman lounging grandly in front of a transplendent theatre he caught at the immediate straw of “disorderly conduct.”

On the sidewalk Soapy began to yell drunken gibberish at the top of his harsh voice. He danced, howled, raved and otherwise disturbed the welkin.

The policeman twirled his club, turned his back to Soapy and remarked to a citizen.

“’Tis one of them Yale lads celebratin’ the goose egg they give to the Hartford College. Noisy; but no harm. We’ve instructions to lave them be.”

同类推荐
  • 中国逻辑与语言函授大学教材——邓小平理论简明教程

    中国逻辑与语言函授大学教材——邓小平理论简明教程

    邓小平理论是当代中国的马克思主义,是我们每一个中国特色社会主义建设者的必修课。学习邓小平理论主要的是学习邓小平同志的原著。我们编写这本教程的目的是提供一个线索帮助读者领会原著的基本精神。我们对于邓小平同志的原著学习得还不够深入,对于其精神实质把握得也不一定准确,很难说对于读者会有多大帮助,谨以此书供读者参考,并恳请读者提出批评。
  • 新课程师资培训教程-高一物理优秀课例

    新课程师资培训教程-高一物理优秀课例

    为新课程实施和提高教师专业化水平而精心编写,选取了大量教案,内容上充分体现了知识性和趣味性。接受课改新理念,感受课改新思维,使用课改新教材,至始至终课改给人一种焕然一新的感觉。它是一次革命,一场对话,一座平台,一把迈向成功教育的钥匙。
  • 国际经济法(21世纪实用法学系列教材)

    国际经济法(21世纪实用法学系列教材)

    随着市场经济的发展、民主政治的推进、依法治国方略的实施,我国的高等法学教育得到了空前的发展,层次众多、形式多样的高等法学教育呈现出一派繁荣的景象。为了适应不同层次法学教育的需要,我社编辑出版了这套以培养应用型法学人才为目标的《21世纪实用法学系列教材》。
  • 语文新课标必读——钢铁是怎样炼成的上

    语文新课标必读——钢铁是怎样炼成的上

    新课标推荐必读名著,这是一部超越国界和语言的伟大作品,被视为青少年的生活必读书,在“感动共和国的50本书”评选活动中位居榜首。书中主人公保尔·柯察金的身上有着十分可贵的精神,这是一种对革命理想的忠诚信念、百折不挠的战斗意志和部畏困难的乐观主义。千千万万的青少年曾被感动,勇敢地选择了自己的生活道路。保尔精神永远活在人间,代代相传。
  • 肖像写作指导与好词好句好段(下)

    肖像写作指导与好词好句好段(下)

    作文是经过人的思想考虑,通过语言组织来表达一个主题意义的文体。写作文可以培养广大青少年思考问题的能力、组织能力、阅读与分析能力以及语言表达能力等,并且可以开阔思维,敞开思想,进行大胆地想象。
热门推荐
  • 太荒传

    太荒传

    飘渺破败的天地,神魔寂然的过往,万灵共耀演绎着这个时代最后的辉煌!
  • 轮回归零时

    轮回归零时

    有人说世间万物皆有始终,那么最初的最初一切是从哪里开始?又将从哪里结束?来自云端的唱诵唤醒了沉睡中的长眠者,神的语言从远古传来将命运的轮回唤醒。他以为他这辈子就这么既不平静也不传奇的过去了。直到有一天有人告诉他,这世界存在着一扇门,门的背后藏着整个世界的命运,而你的使命就是推开它,你因此而生
  • 春秋那些事儿.吴越争霸卷

    春秋那些事儿.吴越争霸卷

    春秋末年,吴楚越三国由于累年的血仇,爆发了长达近一个世纪的厮杀与混战。在一百年的时间里,兵燹荼毒江南,壮士饮血沙场。最终,三个国家都被自己的仇恨与欲望所吞没。逃亡、屈辱、怨毒、暗杀、鞭尸、隐忍、阴谋、反间、背叛、自刎,这一个个血淋淋的字眼充斥在这段史简之中,简直就如一个暴力美学大师构思出来的好莱坞巨片,击打着两千年后我们脆弱的灵魂……工人出版社出版。
  • 每天给孩子一个成长感悟

    每天给孩子一个成长感悟

    感悟,就是我们对某些事物或现象有所感触而醒悟或领悟。一个人有感悟才会有情感,有感悟才会有灵感,有感悟才会有心灵的震颤,有感悟才会有收获的喜悦。看到的,听到的,想到的,都能引发我们的感悟。其实,我们时刻都在感悟着我们周围的一切。
  • 怦然心动:就想占有你

    怦然心动:就想占有你

    这是一个女版霸道总裁爱上我的故事。当娱乐圈新晋女神喜欢上了刚刚崭露头角的相声演员,看女神如何抱得男人归。
  • 布衣权倾天下

    布衣权倾天下

    古语言“习得文武艺,货与帝王家。”但也有“安能摧眉折腰事权贵,使我不得开心颜!”看我如何权倾天下。
  • 六年情深

    六年情深

    这本书记叙了福州市鼓楼区茶园山中心小学2011级1班的往事。
  • 何以染君颜

    何以染君颜

    盐系少年×元气少女青梅竹马的校园恋爱温柔歌手×机智律师再度重逢后的难以割舍
  • 大红妆

    大红妆

    沈彤活了两辈子,她觉得最好的时候就是现在了。她有心有力有记性,还有大把的好年华。某人,你听到了吗?这盛世大妆,非我莫属!
  • 天行

    天行

    号称“北辰骑神”的天才玩家以自创的“牧马冲锋流”战术击败了国服第一弓手北冥雪,被誉为天纵战榜第一骑士的他,却受到小人排挤,最终离开了效力已久的银狐俱乐部。是沉沦,还是再次崛起?恰逢其时,月恒集团第四款游戏“天行”正式上线,虚拟世界再起风云!